There is something quite humbling about walking underneath the darkening evening skies of Tokyo after a long day of work.
For 32 years I have walked this atmosphere and for each day,the experience is still an enlightening moment.So sincere and calming,yet loud in silence and vivid in provoking thoughts.
I had my usual busy day today,working an 8-9 hour shift,and I went to this mexican restaurant named: Guzman y Gomez in Shibuya.I am glad i did because I had an amazing lunch and one of the workers recommended me a dish and i had tears of joy from every bite yo!Hahaha!I like to randomly surprise myself every now and then.
As my day comes to end,I can’t help but feel somewhat empty.No I am not sad,but it’s a form of loneliness that isn’t painful nor tear invoking,It’s just I return to my little apartment and I find myself talking to my echo vibrating off the walls.Am I going insane?Has my mental capacity broken down?Or am I missing someone?It’s more so that I am missing someone very much but I must be mindful that she is also most busy in her life currently.She is working so hard and she is succeeding at a phenomenal rate!I couldn’t be more proud.Maybe I am selfish,but that person makes me so happy when I see her face or hear her voice,so is my loneliness justified?I don’t know,But what I do know is that i miss you,Mari
I am happy whilst in my loneliness,but I’m still yearning nonetheless.
As long as she keeps giving it her all,I’ll look to these wonderful skies and convey my heart to her through the traveling winds!
Have you ever stepped into unfamiliar territory?Have you ever took on a task outside of your skill set?Have you ever felt a fear unlike anything before?Well…I am currently experiencing all of this presently.
I have currently signed on to a new career that has me completely outside of my comfort zone,my skills aren’t remotely on par for this job,and I will be honest,I am literally shaking to my core.
I am currently afraid that I am not good enough to even start this task.I am severely doubting myself and I am physically making myself ill.I despise waking up every morning and I dread the drive to work.I am currently in America by the way lol.Yikes!
You know where and what fear is?Fear is self manifested and it comes from within.When you doubt yourself,those “i can’t” phrases become real.You become crippled by your own nonsense.It’s haunting.But you know what?You CAN do anything if you believe in yourself.Slowly but surely,I am convinced that i can do this.I can conquer all.I just have to defeat myself,Fear.
Ohayou!!!My lonely little blog.It’s been some time since I last jolted down my thoughts here,ne?My apologies.
Well today I’m going to most likely do a double posting.YESSSSS!Two post in one day yo!Wooooo!
The first,will of course,be the one I am currently conceiving “Kyo dake” (Only Kyo),which will serve as an update type blog on things surrounding me.
First and foremost,I don’t watch the news much,because I am not really home often to stay current with television,but,I was on my twitter and an article about a 16 year old high school student from Nagasaki murdering her classmate.It’s not just murder,but she also dismembered her also!It’s such a horrible event and Japan isn’t known to be violent nation,but we unfortunately have dark and grim events take place.May the victim soul rest now and the murderer sins be judged.No one has the right to take another’s life!no matter how much you hate them or become annoyed,never turn to violence!
You can read the story
last; I recently got job at a phone center here and I was most thrilled when I obtained the position,but after the training finished and I was able to work on the production floor (taking the calls),my nightmare began!First:I was locked out of my billing systems and troubleshoot tool so its near impossible for me to do my job,second: I couldn’t find my damn supervisor who happened to work a later shift than mine and I had no way of engaging him about my issue,and last: I got scolded and basically insulted by my operation manager and all I could do is bow my head and say “I understand.”That place is hell but I’m not a quitter.Sometimes I have to step out of my comfort zone in order to grow ne.
Well,that’s how my life is going since my last entry here.I hope you all are having a wonderful August yo!ヽ(^^)ノ
Until next post
Take care everyone