it’s a bit too early for me to be writing,but when I feel sleepless,I figured that it’s the perfect time to write.Sleepless,yet most creatively conscious.that is how I describe my extreme bout of insomnia.
November is a month a self reflection for me.The season decides to change from mildly warm to cold and I find it most fitting to do some self reflection during this transitional month.
Each day,I walk outside the doors of my apartment and I gaze upon the trees in my neighourhood,admiring the changing colours of the leaves.I see people clothing change from short sleeve shirts,skirts,tank tops,and light shoes into sweaters,coats,boots,and long pants.With the seasons,we also change in ways to adapt to our surroundings,but how much of a change do we undergo during the season?
Sitting in my bedroom everyday before the sun rises,I often reflect on the new characteristics I have undergone to become who I am today.Yes,I am guilty of adopting some new traits to better please someone else.Be it right or wrong,I bear no regrets for trying to better myself in the hopes it will bring a smile to that face.Furthermore,how much am I willing to transform?How much do I risk losing my core features in exchange for the unknown?I have reached an answer.I don’t risk anything.I just live with who I am.
I am never going to be ultra intelligent,I am never going to have celebrity looks,I am not going to be a soothing voice to sing away troubles of the world,and I can not guarantee that everything I touch will turn to gold,but one thing I can never say I did do,and that is turn my back on myself.I will not betray my beliefs and morals to become a pedestal rider.I am not entirely funny,but my offbeat brand of humour has made people who have known me laugh,my half covered face isn’t drop dead gorgeous ,but I have been able to appear and cheer a few people up,and my overall personality is not meant for everyone to understand.If you get me,you can continue to walk with me and all of my flaws,but if you don’t,it’s best to not tail me,because I will never be made into an image unbefitting of my soul.
In the end,you are better off being true to who you are,rather than risk lying to yourself for a moment’s gain.Look yourself in the mirror,embrace every little thing about yourself,build up a confidence unshaken by no one,and give rise to a better YOU for the future.Afterall,no one likes to be second,so play second to none ne.
Thank you for reading.